Funny one line zingers. One Line Jokes 2019-02-12

Funny one line zingers Rating: 7,6/10 1737 reviews

One liner jokes

funny one line zingers

If you want anything done, ask a woman. Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering - and it's all over much too soon. If I hit it left, it's a hook. Here's an epitaph that is also a chiasmus, from the headstone of the famous boxer Jack Dempsey: A gentle man and a gentleman. He talked with His hands. People who fly into a rage always make a bad landing. We will never have true civilization until we have learned to recognize the rights of others.

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Funny One Liners

funny one line zingers

Loyalty to petrified opinion never yet broke a chain or freed a human soul. Cunningham A Word to the Wise, by the Wordwise It is Homer who has chiefly taught other poets the art of telling lies skillfully. One Line Status for Girls I am sassy and I know it! That is what fiction means. Arguments are extremely vulgar, for everyone in good society holds exactly the same opinion. More Greek Speak Wit is educated insolence. He who multiplies riches multiplies cares. If I exist at all, I am like music, forever modulating into new keys.

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Joke for Sunday, 01 February 2009 from site Belief net

funny one line zingers

And there are compelling reasons for us to do so. There is no observer, no observed. The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them. Hot, because you can catch a cold. What is the difference between a taxidermist and a tax collector? A tornado of roses from divine. Let me not defer or neglect it, for I shall not pass this way again. Until you hire a lawyer.

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Golf Puns, One

funny one line zingers

Worrying is like paying on a debt that may never come due. Immersed in Emerson: the Epigrammatic Wisdom of Ralph Waldo Emerson To be great is to be misunderstood. Because those men already have boyfriends. Cosmetic Surgery Come in and have your faith lifted. Allstate: You're in good hands. Help stamp out, eliminate and abolish redundancy! Longfellow We are ancients of the earth, And in the morning of the times. Bombs don't kill people, explosions kill people.

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Short Jokes

funny one line zingers

Come As You Are You are not too bad to come in and you are not too good to stay out. Q: What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? Reader, suppose you were an idiot. It is the source of all true art and all science. People are either charming or tedious. After I had finished reliving—perhaps I mean, redying—his assassination, I thought it might be interesting to imagine that I was Lincoln's ghost, reading Whitman's famous elegy on me, 'When Lilacs Last in the Dooryard Bloom'd. If you don't read the newspaper, you are uninformed; if you do, you are misinformed. Just Wing it be it Eyeliner, Life or everything.


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Sarcastic One

funny one line zingers

How do you empty a pool full of Canadians? Treasury with nothing, and that was the closest our country has ever been to being even. Anything important is never left to the vote of the people. Send your best zinger to and we'll share the best ones we get! The difference between them and us is that we want to check government spending and they want to spend government checks. I got lost in thoughts. Your intelligence is my common sense.

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42 Funny One Liner Jokes

funny one line zingers

You Christians are so unlike your Christ. Nothing is so hard for those who abound in riches as to conceive how others can be in want. In the beginning the Universe was created. Luckily, this is not difficult. One does well to separate one's career from one's life. Promises God didn't promise a calm passage. Our jokes are nice and easy to memorize to cheer up your friends or use it as a pick up line at the bar to break the ice.

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One Liner Jokes

funny one line zingers

Modern epithets often descend into derogatory slang and racial invective. By clicking on the thumbs-up button you can indicate that you find a particular quote funny, good or that you just like the one-liner. Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons. One Line Status About Myself I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol. A poet can survive everything but a misprint. I got lost in thoughts.

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