The box a penis comes in. Who is the poorest guy in West Virginia? How is a girlfriend like a laxative? Jokes about school Q: Why was the math book sad? This Internet site provides information of a general nature and is designed for educational purposes only. Q: What did the traffic light say to the car? Did you hear about the new corduroy pillows? She told me that newspapers are old school. Q: What did the mushroom say to the fungus? To the baaaaa baaaaa shop! Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as good guys. Q: I can run but not walk, have a mouth but can't talk, and a bed, but I do not sleep. Congress and the Senate will be disbanded. Jokes about food Q: Where do you learn to make banana splits? A: An Investigator Q: What happens if you eat yeast and shoe polish? If there were three women eating ice cream cones in a shop, one was licking her cone, the second was biting her cone and the third was sucking her cone, which one is married? Q: Which is the longest word in the dictionary? A: In case he got a hole in one.
Q: What dog keeps the best time? Why does Santa Claus have such a big sack? Pepper come in a bottle? I never have awesome jokes. What's the difference between a car salesman and a computer salesman? But what do I care? Q: What happened when a faucet, a tomato and lettuce were in a race? Q: Why don't skeletons fight each other? Q: What do you call security guards working outside Samsung shops? What do you do if you come across a tiger in the jungle? A: Because it was framed. Generally, you will be expected to raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels. Q: Why was the broom late? Q: What kind of key opens a banana? What's blue and fluffy A. To give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach. You will learn to make real chips.
A man laughing his head off. He found Alf at his bungalow in Huddersfield stripping the wallpaper from the dining room. Another good thing screwed up by a period. Q: What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? Q: Why are fish so smart? What does a poof and an ambulance have in common? Q: What do you call a sheep with no head and no legs? All the good guys are hung. An old grandma brings a bus driver a bag of peanuts every day. I'm going to stand outside.
A: The month of March! A: Because the queen has reigned there for years! No matter the setting, these 50 hilarious, unsavory are never entirely appropriate. Kick his sister in the jaw. A friend told me I should go to the petting zoo perhaps, to cheer up. What do you call a herd of cows masturbating? You put a little boogie in it. Q: Did you hear the joke about the roof? A: Stick with me and we will go places! Q: Why did the melon jump into the lake? They issue gerbils at the tunnel of love.
It was, of course, black and white, and the station went off the air at midnight, after playing the national anthem. More-complicated funny stuff such as riddles and puns may suddenly seem hilarious. Watching Andie MacDowell attempt English dialogue in 'Four Weddings and a Funeral' was an experience akin to having one's ears removed with a cheese grater. Why do walruses love a tupperware party? Why was the guitar teacher arrested? A: Because it was his doody. A: They eat whatever bugs them Q. There was only silence at the other end of the line, so I finally just hung up.
Q: What kind of dinosaur loves to sleep? Right where you left him. What do you call a man with no arms or legs that can swim across a pool? Q: Why was the belt arrested? A plateau is the highest form of flattery. Q: What is brown and has a head and a tail but no legs? A: It was below C level! Punny riddles Q: What do you call cheese that's not yours? Q: What kind of key opens the door on Thanksgiving? A: It let out a little wine! What do you call a fish with no eyes? Q: What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? Q: Why were the teacher's eyes crossed? The letter 'U' will be reinstated in words such as 'colour', 'favour', 'labour' and 'neighbour. You put a little boogie into it. Q: What did the triangle say to the circle? Did you hear about the party a little boy had for his sisters barbie dolls? A: An Impasta Q: What do you call an alligator in a vest? A: The scientists were brainstorming! A: You look a bit flushed! Most kids are little clowns by nature, but learning how to tell a good joke is a skill that they will need help mastering.
Often heard from the doorway of pubs or during banging dance tunes at clubs: hello paipa - The Sun, The Mirror or The Sport: newspaper reband - The period of recovery and emotional turmoil after rejection by a lover 'I couldn't elp it, I wuz on the reband from Craig' : rebound Saffend - Essex coastal resort boasting the longest pleasure pier in the world. Because there was a face off in the corner. Did we miss a short joke that maybe you have? Q: What has one horn and gives milk A: A milk truck. Q: Who did the zombie take to the prom? Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three. Together they were hiking on a mountain trail when a very large, purple and blue fly crossed their path.
A computer only needs the information punched into it once. I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. Did you hear about the man who was tap dancing? A: Someone who goes around knocking on doors for no apparent reason. Q: Why did the belt go to jail? Enjoyed best with a glass of Why are horse-drawn carriages so unpopular? What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? How is life like a penis? How many male chauvinist pigs does it take to change a light bulb? Oh, and some of them were a leeeeettle bit naughty. He broke his ankle when he fell into the sink. The cross-eyed teacher had trouble controlling his pupils. Q: What runs but can't walk? Legal fetishist gets off on a technicality.